Seven reasons why children misbehave (1102)

Knowing why children misbehave helps you respond more effectively to problems.

1. Sometimes children "act up" to get your attention. Usually, this occurs because children have mistaken ideas about their relationships with you. When this happens, you can ignore the misbehavior and give the child attention during pleasant times or you can redirect the child into a useful behavior.

2. Sometimes when children misbehave they are really imitating you. For example, if you swear, your child may also use bad language. Remember to be consistent in what you do.

3. Children often "test" you. They want to know if you believe in what you say. When this happens, you need to take action in a firm, fair and consistent manner.

4. Children are growing up, and that means striving to become independent. Often both child and parent will need a cooling off period. Look at the limits set. If they still apply, you will need to enforce the consequence, but if they need to be reset because the child is older, talking about it will not undermine your authority. 

5. Children misbehave as a way of protecting themselves when they feel threatened or afraid. Ask the child how he is feeling and reassure him if he is fearful. Never minimize his feelings by telling him his feelings are silly.

6. Sometimes children misbehave because they are feeling bad about themselves and need a boost in self-esteem.

7. Children also misbehave when they are tired, hungry or sick. Schedule errands when children are rested and fed. Keep a regular schedule for meals and naps.

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